I had escaped from the meltable capsule I came in after 50 long years of sitting in my spongelike state--you see, little Lulu Jones had recieved me in her Easter basket from her grandma. I was in one of those little pill-shaped capsules you chuck in water to bear witness to an amazing expansion into--yes, folks--a somewhat larger sponge! Fortunately, I had escaped by running in my capsule until it rolled into a crack in the wall. Poor Lulu. Anyhow, I'd been enjoying my existence in a now-empty house somewhere in central North Carolina when I heard a loud roar and this huge beast with chains around her wrists came barrelling through the living room. I wasenjoying a nice leisurely skate in the bathtub--like a giant half-pipe for someone of my proportions. Then this crazy woman came charging into the bathroom and spotted me. She laughed her hideous laugh and turned on the water. I tried to skate up to the top of the side of the tub opposte the faucet, but it was all to no avail. The water was quickly rising, and each drop of water that touched me caused me to bubble and grow, and to become heavier and heavier. Finally, I knew escape was futile. I submitted myself to total saturation, with the understanding that soon I was to become a full-sized sponge. But the woman left, howling something that sounded like, "Alcatraz, smalcatraz, wah ha ha!" and I was left submerged and bloated with water in the tub.Months passed, in which I grew and grew in the tub. Instead of stopping at what seemed like a sensible size for a sponge, i kept growing! When it rained, leaks in the ceiling dribbled on me, and even when it was dry the leaky faucet kept me growing. I was HUGE! It must've been when I hit around eght feet and at least 400 pounds when the unthinkable happened. It was a dark and stormy night. Water was pouring in from the ceiling and a powerful gust of wind blew away a substantial portion of the wall next to me. I could see lightning dancing across the sky. And then, POW! The water in the tub was struck. I felt myself buzzing with electricty. I began to raise my spongy arm--only to discover it was solid flesh! I was ALIVE! ALLLLIIIIVE!!! And EEEEEVIL! I stood up in the tub, stood on legs made of bone and sinew. I was a giant, a monster, a GIGANTOR! I made to get out of the tub and eat my first meal of human brains, but I tripped on the edge of the tub and hit my head on the sink. When I awoke from my mild concussion, I really did leave in search of my first meal of human brains. It was ten years later that I met my maker, Malice with Chains, in the Elgin Sanitorium for the Criminally Insane. I ate her brain, and SHE'S STILL ALIVE! Since then, we've been pretty much inseparable.