The Fury Give Manic Attackers a Valentines Day Massacre

Bouts, Events, Featured, Recaps » Posted February 21st, 2011 by

There was no surprise to the utter lunacy that transpired on the track as the defending Ivy King Cup champions, The Fury, took on the Manic Attackers for the first time this season.  The Fury skated away with a 145-85 victory over the Manic Attackers and extended their winning streak to eight games, but some of the most memorable action happened before the whistle even blew.

The Manic Attackers took to the track celebrating St. Valentine's Day in true Manic style and handed each of the Fury skaters a Valentine during their intro as the subtly beautiful voice of Bette Midler echoed over the PA singing “Wind Beneath my Wings.”

Manic Man mania spread throughout the league and as each team developed a mascot as their poster child.  The Fury rallied that night behind Fonzo McKnuckles, the white ape apparition sporting a gold chain with brass knuckles and a bad attitude.

The action on the track was fast and furious right from the beginning.  Both teams were adopting the “hit it and quit it” attack.  The Fury got on the board first with a grand slam put up by Kola Loka.  Beth Amphetamine answered right back with four quick points and both teams were off to the races.

The Manics and The Fury stayed evenly matched through the first nine jams until The Fury jammer lineup of Kola Loka, Yvette YourMaker and Ska Face turned up the heat.  The three amigas were making short work of Manic Attackers blocking power duo, Bork Bork Bork and Tamikaze.

Ska Face and Zoe Trocious lined up on the jammer line against each other in the 13th jam.  As the whistle blew, Fury blockers Sonya MouthShut, Tori Adore, Jackie Daniels and Red Zeppelin skating as Brick Fonzo, mashed the pack and worked Zoe Trocious over.  This allowed Ska Face an opportunity to get out in front where she turned on the jets and - in a last second dive at the end the jam - scored an amazing 25 points on five grand slams.  This move put the Fury up 61-8 over the Manic Attackers.

The Manic Attackers weren’t willing to give up just yet and with Bork Bork Bork, Ada Hatelace and Wreck N Shrew banging the bodies on the track, they were well on their way to mounting a comeback.

The scoring was back and forth between both teams’ jammers and in the five jams left in the half, the Manics were able to mass 36 points setting the score at 79-44 in favor of The Fury.  Blocker-to-blocker defense and mammoth grand slams were the flavor for the first half and both teams were dishing out physical punishment in large doses.

As the second half got started, both teams rallied to their captains and coaches and the crowd was in a total uproar.  Five jams into it, The Fury teetered over the century mark and the score was set at 101-51.

As The Fury blocking force was making a minced meat pie out of Zoe Trocious, the Manic Attackers looked to their other jammers to help carry the heavy load of breathing life back into their team.

Wreck N Shrew, Beth Amphetamine and Ruth Enasia were working tirelessly to score for the Manic Attackers, but The Fury enlisted the likes of Sargentina to not only help her teammates recycle the would-be scorers back through the pack, but also to put a few more points up for her team as a jammer as well.

At every turn, there was a one-two combo of Fury blockers waiting for the Manic Attacker jammers and even though they were working hard to get something started for the Manics, it was almost fruitless.

The Manic Attackers still had some fight left in them as the bout was drawing to a close and veteran jammers Ruth Enasia and Beth Amphetamine weren’t going down without a fight.  Even rookie jammer Thievin’ Tyler, who debuted for the Manic Attackers in the final jam and scored her first ever four points, couldn’t bring her team up to a win.  The Fury brought down the house and held on to their winning streak, taking the Manic Attackers in a final score of 145-85.

Ol’ Drrrty Go-Go of The Fury was elected Player of the Game.

The Manic Attackers take on the winless Double Crossers next month and the Fury will take on the Hell’s Belles, as both teams will have a streak on the line as they face off on March 12th.

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